Soc Essay, Research Paper
Single Parent Families (Secondary Review) One of the most damaging myths in our society today is the idea that divorced families are broken. For too long, we ve believed that a family headed by a single parent doesn t work well, that critical elements are missing, and that children who grow up in such families are in trouble. Few would deny that the ideal family includes a mother, a father, and children sharing a single home. But without love, shared values, good communication, a willingness to work together and to learn to compromise, can be a living hell if they are not followed. A real family is classified as a nuclear family, where there are two parents and their children sharing the same household. In many cases, there is only one parent acting as the head of the family. It is either the father or the mother that care for the children alone, or in other words, a single-parent family. With the increasing divorce rate, there has also been an increase in the number of single-parent divorce rate, there has been an increase in the number of single-parent families. The highest rate of single-parent families occurred in the 1930 s where it hit 13.6 percent. It is now coming close to reaching that percentage again after being at a low of only 8.4 percent in the 1960 s. Other factors have also led to the increase of single-parent families, such as: separation, desertion, widowhood, or when a woman chooses to raise her child without marrying the father or having him be a permanent part in the child s life (Baker and Dryden 225-226). It is more common that single-parent families are led by the mother, where 9 out of 10 cases custody is granted to them (Lesile and Korman 528). In America, 20 percent of all families are led by the mother and only 2.1 percent are led by the father. Families with both parents is 76.1 percent. The rest of the children are living in foster care, with other relatives, or were adopted (Baker and Dryden 203). Each family has goals, and those goals do not change whether there is two parents heading the family or only one. Parent(s) have the same goals of raising their children right and to nurture, educate, and protect them. There is, although, a great disadvantage of living in a single-parent family. The fact that there is a lot more responsibilities with one less person to help. Often the children of the family must take on extra chores or other responsibilities around the house in order to assist the parent, which they are at work trying to make a living. It happens frequently, where the parent turns to the children for help with the responsibilities. It s true that research shows that children in single-parent families, on average, tend to do less well in many ways than children in two-parent families. However, all of us know of persons who grew up in single-parent families who turned out fine. In addition, single parent families aren t helped to become strong by focusing only on their weaknesses and problems. Instead, to become an effective family, it s better that they realize and build upon their own strengths. According to Stephen Atlas, author of the book Single Parents if single parent families are willing to work at it and get help when they need it, there are seven benefits that can come to their children and themselves.1. If there was high conflict before a divorce in a two-parent family, a change to single-parent family living can bring about a reduction in tension, hostility, discord and an increase in family solidarity and consistency. When tension is high between parents on their way to divorce, children s emotional needs are often ignored. Rules are not consistently enforced and children feel less secure. When that tension is gone, single parents can focus more on children s needs and return to greater consistency in rule enforcement.2. A single parent may have greater flexibility in planning time with children. Single-parents aren t distracted by the expectations or time demands of another adult. With fewer schedules to negotiate, there may be greater flexibility to spend time with each other.3. Single-parent families may become more interdependent, working-together approach to problem solving and daily living. Single parents depend more heavily on the voluntary cooperation of their children. This cooperation is encouraged by holding family councils, where children are involved directly in making decisions and solving problems. When children are thus involved, they are more likely to help carry out the decisions. 4. The single parenting provides many challenges that are opportunities for growth and sharing. Single parents often need to develop new skills and obtain additional education. While it isn t easy, pursuing the task of balancing a full-time job with full responsibilities for housework and parenting can help make us stronger people.5. Children have wider experiences because they may go between two different spheres of influence. Each single-parent family will have its own unique influence. This can be a broadening experience for children.6. Extended single parent community can provide support. Single parent families are not necessarily isolated or cut off from the broaden community. Nor do they necessarily lack support. 7. Young people may feel more needed and valued as contributing members of the household. In two-parent families, parents typically share the major responsibilities. In single-parent families, each
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