Divorce And Family Mediation Essay Research Paper

Divorce And Family Mediation Essay, Research Paper

DIVORCE AND FAMILY CONFLICT MEDIATION

Till death do us part. Today many people believe marriage is almost like dating. Some men and women meet, and before they get to know one another they make the choice to be wed. That is why divorce rate is higher than it has been in history. Divorce is now a popular solution to problems that many American couples have. Most of these problems could easily be avoided if both individuals would communicate with each other. It seems that in this these last decade more and more people are getting divorced at an alarming rate. Nearly 1.2 million American marriages were dissolved by the courts in 1994- triple the 1960 figure. Experts predict that nearly half of all new marriages will end in divorce. Its purpose is to promote identification of issues, explore alternatives for resolution and allow the settlement of issues by the parties themselves.

I decided on writing this paper on divorce and family conflict mediation. In my personal life I grew up with my mother divorcing twice and in my professional life I see a lot of difficulties in many people’s lives because they cannot communicate effectively. Unfortunately this leads to violence, emotional scaring, substance and alcohol abuse, and children being caught in the middle of a war. In 1993, social scientist Nicholas Zill reported that children of divorced parents are, regardless of their economic circumstances, twice as likely as others to have poor relationships with their parents, drop out of high school and receive psychological help.

When I respond to a couple that are in disagreement the problem is far from starting and the couple is near the breaking point. The lack of communication is the biggest problem that couples face. They cannot effectively communicate their thoughts, desires, and goals to their spouse. This lack of communication leads to conflict and then will lead to divorce if not treated. Generally some sort of substance abuse will invoke feelings and the couple begins to argue and then physically hurt each other. More than half of all spouse and child abuse is directly tied to alcohol and drug abuse. Alcohol and drug addicted persons are seven times more likely to divorce.

I sense that when you look at the problem of divorce and family conflict it has such an in depth facility of issues that are not generally known. I believe that this is an important type of mediation because generally when people get married they love each other, but over the years they do not grow together and lose touch with what brought them together in the first place. With Divorce mediation families can possibly stay together and avoid the pitfalls that arise out of divorce. Think of the children that suffer and the problems they have with violence, school behavior, and substance abuse. Mediation might be the best answer to solve many of these social tribulations.

The origins of divorce are discovered in biblical proportions. “I hate divorce ” (Malachi 2:16) is God’s response to divorce. But I constantly find it necessary to remind the people who attend our divorce recovery workshops: “God hates divorce, but still loves divorced people!” That message needs to be heard. The price for marital breakup is always high.

Therapists and marriage counselors have come forward to say that most marriages do not simply “fail” because of fate or predestination. Rather, what usually happens is that people give up on their marriages because they’re not as committed to making them work as they could be, and because no one has taught them the skills that people need to deal with the disagreements and disappointments of married life together.

A notable fact in the history of divorce is that those countries which have never been Christianized, and those which remained faithful to the Christian teaching for only

A short time (e.g., the regions that fell under the sway of Mohammedanism) conducted the practice on terms more favorable to the husband than to the wife.

Divorce has been around since the time of marriage itself. Although many countries have different opinions on how divorce can be carried out all of them have different views. In Ireland the constitution banned the issue of divorce. It was put before the voters and the law was reversed by less than a 1 percent margin. Ireland is composed of 90 percent Roman Catholics. King Henry the VIII had many wives and divorced many of them against the will of the Pope and the Catholic Church. This set an enormous wave through the religious sect as he created his own church. The Anglican (Episcopalian) or Church of England was created mainly out of his desire to divorce his wives. To me this shows a significant mark in history because of a single person who wanted the right to divorce.

Divorce was generally only handled by the court system. You could file for divorce on the grounds of adultery, abandonment, and abuse to name a few. The process could be lengthy as it slowly proceeded through the court system. Most divorces in the past favored men and generally left women to suffer economically.

I think before mediation there were not a lot of options on how to dissolve a marriage. In the history of the world a lot of bad marriages just stayed together because of religious beliefs and the oath to God. Immigrants that came to this